The Driving Force of the XY Chromosome
a.k.a. male specie, boy, man, guy…whatever (u get the message)
I have learnt (and I’m still learning) one thing from my sojourn in the world of males…guys are pretty simple.
They are driven by who they are, what they do, and how much they make. These three things make the basic DNA of a typical guy-the 3 accomplishments every guy must achieve before he feels like he’s truly fulfilled his ……………emmmm destiny as a MAN. Until he has achieved his goal in those 3 areas, the guy you’re dating or, committed to, will be too busy to focus on you (sorry, truth’s a bitch).
Think about it: from the moment a boy is born, the first thing everyone around him starts doing is telling him what he must do to be a real man. He is taught to wrestle, climb ,get up without crying, not let anyone push him around, taught to work hard(I went through the same training, my dad always saw me as a boy, I guess that’s why he spanked the hell outta me, or was that cuz I was always playing pranks? okay back to the issue here) he is taught to protect and he is especially encouraged to uphold his family name- make something of himself so that when he walks into a room, everybody is clear who he is, what he does, and how much he makes. Each of these things is taught in preparation for one thing: manhood. And until a guy does these, girls only fit into the cracks (ouch!)of his life. He is not thinking about settling down, having kids, or building a home with anyone until he’s got those things in sync. I’m not saying he has to have made it, but at least he has to be on track to making it.
Girls, you need to know this because you have to understand a guy’s motivation-why he spends so much time working, why he doesn’t call regularly or why he is watching his money the way he does. Because in his world, he is being judged by other guys, based on who he is , what he does and how much he makes. That affects his mood. If you know he is not where he wants to be, or not on track for being where he wants to be, then his mood swings will make more sense to you. Your inability to get him to sit and just talk now makes sense. His “on the grind” mentality becomes clearer to you.
At this ‘stage’, it means that you cant really have the guy you want(he is someone totally different). He can’t sit around gisting with you or dreaming about marriage and family, his mind is on how to make more money, how to get a better position, how to be the kind of man he needs to be for you.
These facts don’t sit well with most females. Many of us figure that if a guy truly loves you, the two of you should be able to pursue your dreams together. This is really………..well……….sweet but it is not the way guys work. His eye will be on the prize, and that prize may not necessarily be you if he isn’t up where he wants to be in life. It’s impossible for them to focus on the two-they are just not as gifted as we(girls) are #smiling.
The way you can help him get there is to help him focus on his dream, see the vision and implement on his plan. If you can see yourself in that plan, then latch on to it, because when he reaches the level of success he is hoping to reach, he’ll be a better happier guy for it-and you’ll be happy too.
Guys, did I write your mind???????