Can’t We Just Be Friends?

Having male friends can be great, but sometimes it´s not the easiest thing in the world, is it? The problem with having male friends is that it can all get a bit confusing. Maybe you fancy them deep down, but you´re wondering if they like you or not? Are you better off staying friends? So to help clear the confusion,I did some research on how to be great friends with guys. Do not confuse this with friend zoning though…

Friends only:One of the most important tips for being friends with guys is that often it is best to just be friends. After all, what is more important than having good friends? So keep things simple and don´t confuse the very different situations of being friends and having a relationship.

Firm boundaries: Make sure that the boundaries are very firmly set with your male friends. Many of them will try pushing things at least once or twice. But as I´ve said, being friends is better than confusing the situation, so don´t allow them to get away with it – make it clear that it is friends only.

Respect their girlfriend: Any woman who likes having male friends should remember one very important thing: that she should always respect his girlfriend´s feelings. When your male friend is in a relationship, his girlfriend should come first, so make sure she knows that you are not a danger to her and never behave in a flirtatious way towards him.

Avoid friends with benefits: Whoever thought up this idea? If you sleep with your male friend, he´s a sexual partner or my favorite word- a lover, not a friend. There´s nothing wrong with two single adults having sex, but the “friends with benefits” arrangement can go very sour. What happens if one person wants more? Or if one of you wants to stop, can you go back to being friends? It’s very tricky. Best avoided.

Be yourself: Guys are generally pretty straightforward creatures, and if you´re going to get on with them then the best way is to be yourself. They appreciate that kind of approach, as guys don´t play games. They like you to be who you really are!

Be honest: Honesty is the best policy when it comes to friendships with guys. If you do start to feel differently about them, let them know, but also tell them that it´s ok if they don´t want more. The same goes for when it´s him who wants to turn it into a relationship and you don´t – better to make it clear if you know that you´re not interested.

Don’t flirt: Another of my top tips for being friends with guys is to avoid flirting with them(this is actually a note to myself). It´s unlikely to offend them; in fact they probably won´t mind at all. But they may very well respond, and that´s blurring the boundaries that I mentioned earlier. Keep it simple and be friends only.

Don’t relive the past: Have you ever managed to stay friends with an ex? It is possible, but only if you both accept that the relationship is over. If either of you has moved on, then you must respect the new relationship and avoid reliving the old one. Put it in the past where it belongs, and concentrate on being friends.

Having male friends is brilliant; I´ve always had lots of male friends, but it´s important to just treat them as friends and forget about their gender. Enjoy what they bring to your life. Some couples do turn a friendship into a great relationship, but generally the two things should be kept well apart. Have you any helpful tips for being friends with guys?

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