The Marriage Convo…
AS ORIGINALLY POSTED ON http://www.i2sabi.com :
I started this post two days after the World Cup but I kinda got lost after three words(hehehe, blame my muse). So the idea for the post popped into my head when I got a message from @TheNosike on our I2Sabi group chat -yeah, we have our own chat room, we’re cool like that but I digress.
He said the next time we watch the World Cup, we would all be married with kids and blah blah blah, this was the first message I saw when I woke up that morning, so you can imagine how pissed off I was. In my mind I was like, who the fuck does he think he is to put such pressure on me(and the rest of the group, of course). What if I don’t want to be married by then, what if all I want to have accomplished by then is climbing a mountain, in Poland…during winter? Huh? That would be an awesome accomplishment by the way, I don’t even want to know what you think.
Still on the matter, yesterday I heard that my godson’s mother was leaving for the States, indefinitely, because her husband is a lowlife scum! Let me drop the backstory so you can share in my vexation. Here goes:
Uncle Chidi and Aunty Busola have been dating for 11 years, finally they decide to get married, her family hates him but he has a way of charming people, so he got past the Spanish Inquisition. Uncle Chidi is a chain smoker, womaniser and a part-time liar, he didn’t pay the wedding photographer(he thought it was ridiculous), he stopped giving her money for the house but as a “strong” wife she decided to use her own salary to take care of the home. Aunty Busola gets pregnant and and gives birth, but work takes her to the other side of Lagos so sometimes, she sleeps over in her sister’s house, while uncle Chidi who is supposed to be babysitting, would bring girls to the house, now Aunty Busola is fed up and she has gone…with my godson!
Now you get my vexation, yeah?
So my mum and I got talking about the whole marriage thing and I was like, what’s the point sef, everybody should just stay on their own and visit once in a while for kwanangida. And she said, no, you should still have faith in the instuition, because it’s not all bad and it got me thinking, if I was to get married today, what would be my reason? But I wanted to know what my closest friends thought, and I asked them to give me just one reason why they would get married. Here are the answers I got, quite interesting I might add.
I don’t have an answer yet.
Err, I honestly don’t know how to answer this
For me, I guess stability
Age//when I’m say 33,I’ll probably have to “settle down”//Or if I got a girl pregnant
Uhh, because society says I have to settle down and have kids legally?
Love probably//if not what’s the point really?
For companionship and babies
Companionship I guess.
Love I guess.
Love and companionship and my need to to bear kids.
Because I love and enjoy being with her, to put it simply I guess.
Love// these days I think I’d get married so I don’t grow alone.
Security and stability…they’re one package
The only reason that comes to mind is “because I want”
I will get married because I don’t want to hurt God or my parents.
To never feel lonely.
Cos I’m ready for that phase of my life
Cos i’ll need a cute babysitter when I’m 80//Free house-keeping and stuff.
The replies from the guys asides @TheNosike (of course), really touched me and made me feel like there is still hope out there and like I keep preaching, “All guys are not dicks”. So, ladies if you are interested, send me an email, if you send me a DM then I know you are not serious, because these are premium men, okay? Write a freaking email…x
My friends asked me what my answer would be and I made them wait till they saw the post. Here is my answer:
I’m an extremely private person and I have never really fantasized about being married(only the wedding day because……..Party!) so the reason I would get married is because I found someone I wouldn’t mind kissing in public.
Yes, PDA is a big deal for me and I wouldn’t do it with a boyfriend because I don’t know how many I might have *covers face*, check my record though. Anyhoo, that’s it guys, I would love to hear your own reasons, so please drop a comment and let’s chat.